Most days in your life you never stop to think how precious life is and how quickly it can be taken away. Last week I realized how each moment of each day needs to be taken advantage of and no matter how difficult things may be there are always ways to do more. Last week my dad lost a sudden battle to a health issue he didn't even know he had, nor did his doctors. He went from feeling fine to in the ER, to cardiac arrest in a matter of hours. There was no warning and no time to say goodbye. Thankfully my step mom was with my dad when he passed.Words cannot express the sadness you feel over a loss of a parent and a life but the overwhelming thought that you could and should have had more time. More time to spend, more time to learn from him, more time to give Alexander to know his Grandpa Vernon. That will unfortunately never be.
Over the past few days I have had time to reflect on this experience, pray about it, and think about how I can learn from it. I know my dad would have wanted me to learn something, to take away something to use in life. I can tell you that each moment should be taken advantage of...that each person in your life no matter how they have treated you...regardless of how much you don't look forward to getting up each day to go to work, driving the kids to their 500 activities, or even paying your bills, you better appreciate that those people are alive, you're breathing, and your kids are healthy enough to be in those 500 activities because in a blink of an eye it can all be taken away. I don't mean one day it's here the next it's gone, I mean in a snap, a blink, an instant, gone. I went to bed on Wednesday night and 2 hours later I was being called by my sister telling me our dad was dying.
So, my lesson in all of this is to always, always, always find each second of every day - of every moment, precious. Do everything you can no matter if the other person doesn't reciprocate...because in the end you need to be able to say you did all you can, you did everything you could to make each moment the best moment.
I am thankful that despite years of dealing with a strained relationship with my dad that I did have time to spend with him in Arizona, at my wedding, and right after Alexander was born, just to name a few. The lives of many people have been instantly changed but hopefully dispite the challenge that this will bring, they will learn and take forward something my dad would have wanted. I realized last night after my sister decided to scare the crap out of me at an ATM by pointing her finger in my back that my dad wasn't around anymore to hear those funny stories and how much he would have laughed that she did that. I could hear his laughter as soon as she did it, bellowing. That is the laughter that we all need each and every day. Relish in it because it can all be over. Here's to you dad - laughter, fun, and cheers with a really great margarita!
